To offer your services for free

Sometimes, because of the hard times I've had applying for a job, I thought of just working for free and offer my services for free. I just couldn't tell them you know I need money just to keep up even a few of it, and I'll be working for free. I could price my services high up maybe 50000 to a hundred thousand but I don't. Sometimes, I think why don't I just do that. Sometimes, I want to do this because I need to exercise my talents and the desires of my heart so that I can say I have done something that is close to my purpose in life. But then I think I need to find where I could do that or maybe simply I've got to try. I need to try now the unconventional. I have to ask. I have to ask for what I want. I've got to be creative about it. Just so I can do what I want, my life's purpose.

To life a fuller life

To live a fuller life means to have as much relationships I could have in my life. To find my purpose in life. To do what you want to do each day of your life.

I do not wish to waste my life in not living fully. I got to be at least happy for what I have accomplished all these years and I am very much excited about my experiences in life not that I have a few regrets for right now I still have some questions unanswered in my life and problems to tackle and solve and adventures to experience.

But you know that's life and you just have to be awake in the morning and welcome the new day and start on something new each day and continue the ones that are unsolved yet or yet lift them up to God so that He takes care of your problems and everything will just fall into place because that's what life is all about.

Have you wondered what your mission on earth really is. Me I think it's a combination of experiencing things like pleasure or desire and sometimes even pain to help you get tough but also there are higher things like feeding the hungry and giving to the needy and all. It could also be helping your family. I think I have a lot to do in this world but I need not be money bound that I couldn't help other people because I myself don't have money for my needs or for my family. There's something that I could do to at least give me an option to move into what I really wanted.

I often list my dreams and in one way or another they do come true. I felt I have done much to the world but still there are dreams to be made and make come true. Before, I thought that my mission extends only to my family as in being a good provider for my family but that hasn't come true only for a few years and now I wish to be rich and do that for my family but now not only for them but for other people as well.

I gotta move where I can reach. I gotta help other people. There are desires in my heart that want to get out and become reality such as teaching kids, feeding the hungry, giving to the poor and so on. But I gotta figure out a way to do that. And altogether, also solve my money problems. I pray to God each night that my dreams will come true for Him and for me and for everybody.

To count money

I have sometimes the feeling of being guilty when I surf the net for it will cost me or my mom or my sister some money in order to take advantage of this privelege. I've been out of work for some time but this is the only time that I became so conscious about not having money. Sometimes it would take you years to apply for a job. Very frustrating. I am counting the money that I spend for internet while I think that I have a grandma whom I cannot help because I do not have a job. We are not rich and so is my grandma but I know in her own way she is rich, I just wanted to help her. I could not afford so many things in this world that I wonder is it ever fair. All they could do it to give me a chance why don't they do that? Is it so hard to give a small share of the pie to somebody who is hungry? Sometimes the world is really unfair. The rich could talk about billions of money while the poor have only their daily needs. It is so unfair. I was wondering where the jobs go in this world. To the graduates? What if you don't have a college degree? I just wish for a miracle to happen in this world. Where everybody gets a fair share of the blessings that abound from God.

Sometimes my friends maybe wondering why I don't go out to the gimiks anymore. I just count the money. Today, you gotta have at least a thousand in your pocket when you go out. And to us, to me and to my mom that's already two weeks worth of food. So alas, I couldn't go. Just praying that I'll have a job so that I can help me and my family.

Henry Sy and John Gokongwei were some of my idols. They started a poor fellows and now they own some of the big businesses in the country. I dream that I can be like them. I was wondering how they did it. They must have dirtied their hands and met up with people and sold their stuffs and used their minds to build up their businesses the way they have achieved now.

I got to imitate them and somehow do what they did so that I could count plenty of money in the future under my name and accomplishments. I gotta start now. Somehow, I feel I have wasted my 10 or 12 years of not working but then I grew up and the experiences I have had during those times contributed to who I am now and how I live today. I have some idea on how to start on something today but I am learning about it everyday for money making has been a challenge for me. Maybe there's a block like for example I hate accounting and I felt it has followed me all these years in every move I make in jobs or business what I think was a lesser choice of having taken up accounting as a college course. Sometimes, I wish I had shifted to MassCom or Business Management and graduated earlier so that I could focus on working early on. You see I am motivated to work only nobody gives me a chance. Anyway, I believe that in the end all will work out and that the world or God works for justice and that everything will follow through if not today maybe tomorrow, I still hope.